Maybe They Set the “Shibari” Too High?

I’m all for crazy sex. If you want to let your freak flag fly, fly it high in the sky. Really though, what people do in the comfort of their own homes–or not, if you’re into exhibitionism–is their business. That is, until someone ends up dead.

Most Europeans have a reputation for being a lot more “free” sexually than other people in the world. I’ve heard some crazy stories, but this one beats them all. A 42-year-old Italian man and his 24-year-old girlfriend decided to add a friend to their usual practice of Shibari (Warning: Don’t click if you’re squeamish; it’s intense).

Shibari is a kind of Japanese bondage that “involves the use of thin pieces of rope to bind the submissive partner in ways that are meant to be both artistically beautiful and also heighten the sensation of his or her orgasm.” These three decided—after heavy drinking and a hashish smoking session—that they should hang the two bound women from the rafter for greater pleasure. No big deal, right? Then, something went wrong. (Shocker.)

The inexperienced friend fainted, causing the ropes to tighten on the girlfriend’s neck and strangling her to death. The man was “arrested and charged with involuntary manslaughter, and later released on house arrest.” I get that apparently one in 10 couples in Italy practice “extreme sex,” but seriously?! I’m sorry, were these two mental to think that something wouldn’t go wrong doing something that dangerous with a newbie. It’s called safe sex for a reason.

When my friend told about this story of an accidental death by sex I thought, “This can’t be something that happens that often.” I was so wrong; the article goes on to list multiple deaths that have occurred within the last year. So the basic message is ladies and gentlemen, if you’re going to do S&M or any kind of kinky, crazy sex, let’s try to use our heads at least a little in the planning process. Think with your head, not your genitalia. Thanks.

-Erin Elzo